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Question
Posted by: Didi | 2008/07/22

Accusing

My hubby just came from work yesterday and he called me while he was busy in the toilet, he told me that he heard that a certain woman (public servant employee) was leaving late from work to home and telling honey he is studying.
he said wshe failed cause she was not studying instead she was having an affair with his deputy director. I wrote my exams during May/June and i failed and i am a public servant employee, he then ask me why i failed whereas i was saying i was studying. I mean i never came after six at home he then accusses me of having an affair my heart was bleeding with pain knowing that i don' t have an affair and not attracted to anyone.
Iam so confused and deeply hurt, what should do ?

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Our expert says:
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Now what was he getting at ? Was he trying to suggest that your failure in the exams must have had the same cause, ie an affair, as this other woman's ? Why on earth should he assume that ? Can you persuade him to join you in marriage counselling to explore and understand this, and identify what has been going wrong within your relationship, so you can try to fix it ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: didi | 2008/07/22

Yes, he assume that and i mean i never got enough chance to study as he was always abusing me verbally due to the debts that i made without consulting me so is my life now he always brings this on and yesterday he just assumed that.

I tried to involve him in the counselling and he says he doesn' t need one, i' m the one who should cause my mind is not okay. I just feel useless more exspecially when he does not want to go to the psychiatric, i went there twice they invited him too but he is refusing

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