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Question
Posted by: Concerned friend | 2009/11/25

Abused

Hi Doc,

I have a male friend who has recently exposed that he was abused as a child. His in his mid thirties and hsa never sought counselling before. His bahaviour has been rather distructive isince the age of 20 ie alcohol abuse, getting into fights and just a very angy person. His married with a child and his wife is really at her wits end as to what next. She has requested he seek therapy but his so afraid to go back to what happened as a child, he feels it may not help him infact he feels it may change him into someone else. Generally he is a excellent, father, husband, provider except when he takes a drink and most recently experimented with Cocaine. My heart goes out to this friend as he truly is a good soul but has been really damaged. My question is does therapy always work? What are the risks involved? Is hypnosis type therapy an option? Please advise
Thanks

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

He does deserve skillful therapy, preferably NOT wih someone who focusses only on adult durvivors of child abuse, as such people moften have their own onsessions and problems which they work out using their clients. He'd do best to see a good modern therapist such as one doing CBT ( Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy )who could analyze the current problems and help him modify his maladaptive behaviours. Although obviously an outline of what happened would be relevant in planning how he NOT do what old-fashioned and ineffective therapists do, and which seems to be what he fears, in delving back in great detail, repeatedly, into the ugly events of the past.
Drugs and booze are a temptation for such a person, but will do nothing but harm
Hypnosis could be very harmful in such a person, and no competent genuine expert would recommend it in such a situation. But CBT and similar modern therapy could indeed be most helpful

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Concerned friend | 2009/11/25

Thanks a million for the response Doc, I have been reading up on CBT and found a clinical psychologist who specialises in this.

Regards

Reply to Concerned friend
Posted by: cybershrink | 2009/11/25

He does deserve skillful therapy, preferably NOT wih someone who focusses only on adult durvivors of child abuse, as such people moften have their own onsessions and problems which they work out using their clients. He'd do best to see a good modern therapist such as one doing CBT ( Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy )who could analyze the current problems and help him modify his maladaptive behaviours. Although obviously an outline of what happened would be relevant in planning how he NOT do what old-fashioned and ineffective therapists do, and which seems to be what he fears, in delving back in great detail, repeatedly, into the ugly events of the past.
Drugs and booze are a temptation for such a person, but will do nothing but harm
Hypnosis could be very harmful in such a person, and no competent genuine expert would recommend it in such a situation. But CBT and similar modern therapy could indeed be most helpful

Reply to cybershrink

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