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Question
Posted by: Anon | 2012/02/03

Abuse or not

Is this abuse?
About 32 years back i was abused, i think i can call it abuse...
I am a male and a family member also a male used to make me suck him and put his tool in between my legs and cum..
Used to also play with me and make me play with him as well..
I was about 6/7 yrs at the time, i dont think i knew right from wrong..
Not sure why i didnt speak, maybe i was afraid.. i dont know..

Its this sexual abuse, could it have effected my growing up, should i have spoken, should i seek help???

Tx

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

It is most definitely a form of sexual abuse and no adult had the right to subject a minor to any of this behavior. Most probably you did not speak up due to fear of what he might do to you/that no one will believe you and furthermore children are often left with a dilemma: on the one hand they do not want this behavior and on the other hand they experience a sort of acceptance that they are not willing to jeopardize. The bottom line is – It is illegal behavior on the side of the adult and no child should ever be exploited in that manner.
It most definitely could have had an impact on your emotional and psychological development. It would most probably be a good idea to explore the impact in the safety of a therapeutic relationship with a psychologist or therapist that specifically deal with sexual concerns.
For further information please consult SASHA’s website at www.sexualhealth.qw.co.za/dru. For referral to a professional in your vicinity, please send an email to helpline.sasha@gmail.com.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

3
Our users say:
Posted by: Anon | 2012/02/03

Ken,

Are you married now, has this in any way effected you?
Have you done things that you think that this could have lead you to..
i think the has really had a psychological impact on me... i think i could have been a better person now if i had spoken about this.
now i think its too late... i think i ruined my life and my family life..
My wife wants a divorce due to things that i have done in teh past..

Reply to Anon
Posted by: ken | 2012/02/03

Anon you not alone, when i was 7-8 years a family member also male used to make me play with his thing and he played with mine until he cum, i din''t tell anyone because i was scared and i didn''t know it was sexual abuse.

Reply to ken
Posted by: Sexologist | 2012/02/03

It is most definitely a form of sexual abuse and no adult had the right to subject a minor to any of this behavior. Most probably you did not speak up due to fear of what he might do to you/that no one will believe you and furthermore children are often left with a dilemma: on the one hand they do not want this behavior and on the other hand they experience a sort of acceptance that they are not willing to jeopardize. The bottom line is – It is illegal behavior on the side of the adult and no child should ever be exploited in that manner.
It most definitely could have had an impact on your emotional and psychological development. It would most probably be a good idea to explore the impact in the safety of a therapeutic relationship with a psychologist or therapist that specifically deal with sexual concerns.
For further information please consult SASHA’s website at www.sexualhealth.qw.co.za/dru. For referral to a professional in your vicinity, please send an email to helpline.sasha@gmail.com.

Reply to Sexologist

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