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Question
Posted by: nunods | 2010-05-14

A terrible first time...trauma?

I''m 27 and I was a virgin until recently. When I met my girlfriend I found that she was not a virgin and so I didn''t tell her I was...the thing is things when very wrong on our first time because I just couldn´ t do it and she reacted badly to that. Of course I told her the truth right after but I still can''t get over that moment, although she has apologised to me a thousand times and we now have a great sex life (starting the day after that!) I still can''t get over it...Should I look for help or this might pass in time?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

I think the way you managed it was great! It also seems that besides the embarrasment factor you are also doing great now! Relax - as time pass you will be able to laugh about it and your girlfriend will treasure the moment of introducing you the wonderful worl of sex. If however you find that your general functioning is impaired by this experience, consult a professional or phone the SASHA helpline for a referral.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: simone | 2010-05-15

Hey common.Things like that and even worse happen anytime.You have overcome it so go hrad forget it.
Anton chekoov has a short story who had sneezed on a colonel and could''nt forgive himself.You know what happened? In the end he died becouse of worries.Common don''t worry,worries are like rocking chair,it gives you something to do.but it takes you nowhere.She has already forgotten, you should forget,too.

THANKS,Simone!

Reply to simone
Posted by: Vrye Denker | 2010-05-14

Hey, things like this happen, get over it. Obviously if she gave you another go, it''s not that big a deal. Learn to forgive yourself.

Reply to Vrye Denker
Posted by: sexologist | 2010-05-14

I think the way you managed it was great! It also seems that besides the embarrasment factor you are also doing great now! Relax - as time pass you will be able to laugh about it and your girlfriend will treasure the moment of introducing you the wonderful worl of sex. If however you find that your general functioning is impaired by this experience, consult a professional or phone the SASHA helpline for a referral.

Reply to sexologist

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