Posted by: stressed | 2008-11-17

12 year old with sexual curiousity

I have a problem and am glad I can refer it to yourself. Last night I saw on my 12 year olds cell phone that he was downloading video' s which says you must be 18 and over to watch. Normally I would have FREAKED out but I tried to understand that he would be curious about women and sex. I am very worried though about what effects it would have on him looking at things he cleary needs to be 18 to look at. I dont want to over FREAK OUT that he thinks sex is a very, very wrong thing and he may end up been a serial killer! How must I handle this situation?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

You are a very wise parent. At the ages of 12 or 13 it is normal for children to become sexually curious as their hormones start to create the changes that will lead to puberty. This is a golden opportunity for you to start that very difficult conversation of discussing sex with your children, you are very clearly aware of the dangers of telling children that sex is wrong. Sit down and discuss these issues with him, and in an unthreatening way, allowing him the space to discuss with you, what is feeling. This will allow for further conversations in the time to come, and will convince him that he came being these kind of problems to his mother, who will answer them in a non-judgemental way. One of the biggest tragedies of modern life, is that children and adolescents feel they cannot discuss their problems with their parents because they will just become angry. Don't worry about the 18 age restriction. This is just a but the suggestion from the censorship board, and is not written in stone. Rather do what is best for your child.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Nick uwc | 2008-11-18

Well i don' t think you should stress about it. I agree with you that he is approaching that period in his life where he is beginning to experiment with sex. The cellphone issue (downloading) is cause for concern however i think you should address it in a balanced and appropriate manner.

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