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Question
Posted by: DISAPPOINTED MOM | 2008/09/30

12 YEAR OLD AND PORN

I walked in one morning with my son watching porn. This belongs to hubby. Hubby feels its fine that he wanted to watch cos he is a boy.
I dont agree. How do I explain to hubby this.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageTeen expert

Hi there,

given his age he is going to be curious about sex, and so he will explore this via the means available to him. So if porn is there he is likely to look at it.

In terms of what his father said the two of you need to have a discussion and come to some agreements about what you feel is appropriate for him. The legal age for pornography is 18 years old, so technically it is illegal for him to be viewing it. There is also his sexual and emotional development to consider in that at 12 he should be thinking about himself and his sexual development in an age-appropriate way. What he is going to view with pornography is about adult sexuality and not 12 year old sexuality, so from this point of view it is not helpful to his development to be gaining sexual insights via adult material.

12 year olds will be curious and may look at porn, but giving him licence to do so is highly questionable at his age.

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Kman | 2008/10/02

Hi there,

I do agree that children do have a natural curiosity towards sex albeit porn. Pornography can skewer a childs view of sex, the porn industry " glamourises"  certain aspects of sex that guys then start seeing as normal practise and its not. Pornography can be VERY damaging to people let alone a child of such a young age, not to mention that it can become an addiction. It is a fact that more and more children are coming into contact with pornography through various interfaces like cell phones, dvds and such, I personally think this problem needs to be addressed with the greatest of urgency.
Obviously your son is curious...as any child of that age is, its just that in my personal opinion I dont agree with him watching pornography at his age. I am not saying that its ok for a 15 or 16 year old to watch porn but 12 years old is very young to be viewing such material.

Best of Luck :-)

Reply to Kman
Posted by: Anon | 2008/10/01

I am no expert but i can tell u its only normal. Haven t really heard of a parent encouraging it though. I would say its a bit too early ur son, he aint even a teen yet but maybe he is mature for his age &  if so his hormones are probably raging right now. Guys &  girls at this age will watch stuff like that out of curiosity, i did too BUT if ur husband is letting ur son watch this then its only right for him to explain to ur son the consequences he will have to face if he practices this irresponsibly, Im not saying ur husband must tell ur son to go have sex but he should as a parent make him aware of everything that comes with growing up &  wanting to experiment. As for ur son watching these movies, he should do it a place else where than the house or discreetly in the privacy of his own bedroom but make sure he will not try anything without being properly educated about any sexual activities. Face it, its safer knowing his watching it than going out there &  doing it.

Reply to Anon

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