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Question
Posted by: dw | 2011-08-10

10 month old twins exposed to violence

Hi, my bf has twins with his ex fiance who is staying with her mother. Over the weekend the ex''s mother came home drunk and beat her up. The children were exposed to this! The ex fiance is not working and cant drive and cant afford to move out of her mothers home, she is 25. He is now worried about his kids being exposed to this violence. What should he do in this situation? It is affecting our relationship as he is so ''out of it''. What can I do to help him? Please help. Thanks.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If her mother beat her, maybe she should consider laying criminal charges of assault against the nasty old woman ? Maybe he should ask CHild Welfare to assess whether staying with the mother is suitable for the children's benefit ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: HH | 2011-08-10

i''M sure he told you she walked out, a women with twins and a fiance does not just WALK OUT, come on. there must be a reason, its for you to find out or find out tru your own experience.

Reply to HH
Posted by: Beano | 2011-08-10

God suggestion by man - he should let her stay in his home and he move out.The courts will force him to provide anyway.He needs 2 pay for his kids,if he can afford a GF he can afford to do the right thing.

Reply to Beano
Posted by: Man | 2011-08-10

He still has a legal and moral obligation to ensure his kids are okay.
Also a woman with 10 m0nth old kids does not walk out for no reason.
Why does he not move in with his mother to ensure the wellbeing of his kids?

Reply to Man
Posted by: dw | 2011-08-10

To Man, because she walked out and left him !!

Reply to dw
Posted by: Man | 2011-08-10

Your boyfriend should be supporting the children by providing a home for them and the mother - if he was doing this she would not have to stay with her drunk abusive mother.
Why is he not doing this?

Reply to Man
Posted by: Lillli | 2011-08-10

And is he? The worst father? Does he swear at her too? Is this the kind of man you want in your life? Has he ever sworn at you? Do you think he ever will? How does he treat you? How does he treat his mother and his sisters? How does he treat other woman/people?
Answer these questions honestly and decide whether he deserves the things she threatens and your support.

Reply to Lillli
Posted by: dw | 2011-08-10

Hi Lillli, no the relationship between my bf and his ex is hectic. They fight all the time, swearing at eachother, she blaming him for stuff and saying she is going to sue him for full custody of the kids, telling him he is the worst father in the world, etc, etc.

Reply to dw
Posted by: Lilllli | 2011-08-10

Be supportive and understanding. The children are always going to be part of the package and deserve to be protected first and foremost. Also be supportive of the ex as she is the mother of the children and comes with that package. What is the relationship like between bf and ex? Is it amicable?

Reply to Lilllli
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-08-10

If her mother beat her, maybe she should consider laying criminal charges of assault against the nasty old woman ? Maybe he should ask CHild Welfare to assess whether staying with the mother is suitable for the children's benefit ?

Reply to cybershrink

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